Maybe Maby by Willow Aster
This book has put me through absolute curiosity from the blurb, and then cover to cover – it pleads to be deeply read. I was not mistaken by Willow Aster’s talent to come up with a story that has both the power to make you and break you, while keeping things relatively fun. Immersing into an alternate reality is always an enriching experience for me, I’m always eager to know not just the norms but also the abnormalities that make up a person. I loved this book, for its ability to make me believe that things could possibly change for the better even if life has pinned you down many times to last another lifetime.
Mabel Armstrong suffers from depression and OCD, it’s an every waking day battle to control herself from obsessively counting and organizing. She always thought she would scare people off with her sickness, that she’s neither capable of loving nor be loved in return – albeit drowning in these self-inflicted pain makes her feel more lonely than she really is. After unexpectedly losing her mother, she has been constantly seeking for companionship but Maby thinks she’s too unwell to reward herself that. But contrary to what she makes of herself, Maby is a woman of substance; she’s compassionate, resilient, smart, witty and beautiful inside-out.
Maby has been pining for her bestfriend, Saul, for a very long time but the man was in a more complicated maze than her so it never really worked for the both of them. Dalton, her cheater ex, was nothing short of a flirtatious pig so that doesn’t really leave her with much choice…until Coen.
How do I love thee, Coen Brady, let me count the ways. He has been secretly attracted with Maby for years but was too intimidated to make a move due to their 3-yr age difference, so he remained as the coffee shop boy who serves her daily dose of Americano. Mr. Nice Guy sure knows how to take it slowly but surely, with his calculated moves that melts your heart into a puddle. If I ever meet a guy like Coen, I’d chain him with me. Hahaha! Seriously, he’s the perfect hero for our damsel in distress. This might be a selfish thing to say but I think that you’d never go wrong with a guy who liked a girl first, and I mean like on the straight way to love. He’s determined, selfless, understanding, and supportive, with a family who’s a reflection of his quintessential personality. He loved Maby all-in, through the good and crazy, in her confusion and misdemeanor, and despite her utter denial, he knew that there was a sliver of hope he can hold on to. Oh, did I mention that he’s also very sweet and thoughtful? Perfection personified.
Alright, I went overboard with Coen.
“Maybe Maby” is not just a story of finding love in the most inconvenient differences, but also about Maby’s consequential journey towards freeing from the fear of her sickness taking over her life. This was about coping, moving on, opening up to more opportunities in life, getting rid of what pulls you down incessantly, allowing happiness to lighten up your world and accepting help openly instead of making yourself feel like a charity case. All throughout the book, I was Maby’s cheerleader – I hurried reading because I am eager to get to where she is better and happier, when I can finally hear the end of her inferiority complex and she’s just too in love to think of all the negatives. But sometimes, it really takes a life-shaking tragedy for you to realize what you couldn’t afford to lose, against all odds. Thank God Coen was okay. <3
If you’re gonna laze the day away, at least save it for a cloudy day, she’d say. Otherwise, the sun will stop shining on you…
“I kissed a girl I’ve wanted to know for a long time, and in a single moment, we were instantly in sync. The stars and planets aligned. I’ve never had a first kiss that was so … perfect.”
“What if it isn’t just looks that you fall for? What if it’s a cosmic aligning of spirits … or maybe even simply pheromones? Or kindred souls that finally connect … whatever it is that makes someone know that they’ve found the half of themselves that’s been missing.”
“Maybe I just remind you of who you want to be … who you are when you’re not trying to be something else.”
“You’ve taken possession of my heart little by little, and now you own it, Maby. Completely.”
“I’m mad that I keep pouring my heart out to you and you keep stomping on it. I’m mad that I had the best weekend of my life and I thought you were feeling it right along with me and then you throw it all away. I’m mad that…”
“If I wanted nice and normal I would have already done that by now, but here I am, wanting you.”
“Don’t say that. I don’t wish you were any different than you are. I love everything about you.”
“but every time I’m with you is wonderful. You’ve seen me at some of my worst times and keep sticking around. I’ve felt like I didn’t deserve you. I admit, I still don’t think I do, but I want to hang onto you.”